Okay...you're personality comes off as nurturing, i.e. you tend to protect those around you and youre not a hard person to get along with. You dont have issues following others as you yourself are easy going. This is good but at times it turns in to compliance as you may passively submit to the will of others (for whatever reasons, may be to maintain harmony).
At times you feel that you lack opportunities in your life and are constantly searching for them.
And Im not sure about this but it seems like youve had some bad company which has had some influence on your actions or habits...may be friends or peers. If yes then it has been bothering you on a subconscious level. Time to change those habits and company.
You also seem to have a certain sense of failure. My be you were not able to achieve what you really wanted, could be related to academic, professional, or personal life. I dont know you personally so I cant exactly point out but you lack sense of achievement. Which is probably the reason for your submissive behavior. Im not saying that youre exactly unhappy with your life or that youre miserable...but at the end of the day you dont quite feel good about yourself...rather good enough. You seem to have some feelings of inferiority from time to time. Also you seem a bit guilty about some of your actions. Has there been a dramatic change in your life? There seems to be a sudden shift in your emotional state due to the changes in your life. You still havent adjusted to that change which is causing some emotional discomfort.
May be you should try out some different things in your life...something youre good at or interested in. May be focus on yourself a bit instead of how everyone else is doing. If you want to make other happy you must first try to make yourself feel good. Or something like that. Im really not good with advices but do try to give yourself some "Me [you] Time". It doesnt have to be big...just may be improve cooking or painting or whatever your interest is. Also...meditate. You know most of the problems that we think we have are only in our heads.
Why hello there familiar blogger ^.^
Yours is a bit tricky so its going to sound more like a conversation than an analysis.
So whats with the resistance? You seem to be a little...um...[forgive me] stubborn in the sense that you refuse to comply with another persons decision. Im not talking generally...something specific in your life. But that isnt necessarily bad...you should be able to make your own decisions but may be take a different approach?
Heres the tricky part...though you do things your way...youre still not satisfied. You know what you want to do and how you want to do and youre not afraid to break the rules. But after going through all that trouble theres still something missing. But then again youre still quite young and figuring life out so its normal.
Also...stop being so passive!
Get closer to people...for real. Feel more.
You may not agree but some support from family and friends would be good.
You seem to feel isolated and rejected. May be you feel that people dont accept you the way you are. Have you lost someone you were close to in the past? Once again, I cant tell precisely because I dont personally know you but its either someones death or physical danger. Which one is it? Though you appear to be fine your internal mental state isnt very stable. I could be wrong [just a noob speaking here]. Anyway...try to open up. Give people a chance to get to know you.
Things always get better with time.
5. random Hyper - Stay tuned.
P.S. a little feedback would be nice you guys. So I know how Im doing.
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