Story Time. Non-Fiction.

Im a terrible person.
Intimacy makes me sick.
I sat next to that bitch. She wasnt as bitchy as I expected her to be.
All the students of third semester hate me. They have their reasons.
A lot of their marks got deducted cuz of me.
Why do people take feelings so seriously?
Something so temporary shouldn't be given that much importance.
I do terrible things to people just cuz Im bored.
People should know better than to trust me.
Rida keeps talking about karma.
I think Im its next victim.
But then again, life hasn't always been awesome so bring it on bitch.

Getting close to people makes me sick.
Something's seriously wrong with me.
I always kick away genuine awesomeness coming my way and then close the door behind it and lock it and let the awesomeness knock its knuckles out till its flesh is smeared and the skeleton turns into dust.
I are so fucked up up there.

I dont like people who try too hard to be funny. And sensitive people. And needy people. I really hope I dont turn into one. Im tired. I dont want to sleep. I've done something really cunningly stupid and bitchy. Simply because I dint have anything interesting to do.
And that's why I dont like being free. I shouldn't have taken the month off. I always end up doing something stupid and someone always ends up getting hurt. And then I have to hurt them even more to make them feel better.

Say I shoot you in the knee and then say sorry I must leave now and then you beg me to stay and Im like...I dont want to hurt you anymore and then youre like please stay and Im like dude...blood makes me sick and you're confused because it was my idea to throw in some blood and you're like But Im hurt so I feel bad and Im all Okay Ima pull out this bullet now and youre like but theres no anesthesia oh wretched one and Im like 'dude...I've doen this before and youre like no dont touch it Im fine just please dont leave me alone and then I have to tie you down but there are no ropes so I have to use a hammer and nails to pin you down so you dont move and pull out the bullet with pliers and youre screaming and Im ignoring cuz I know you will feel better eventually but you just want it to end and just when you think its over I take out a needle and thread to stitch back the wound and you're like Why are you doing this to me? Im like dude...please...stop being so dramatic and then I fix the wound and leave and you're left with is a scar and hatred.
Yea. That pretty much explains my past week.

Also, I dont like friends who ask for too many favors, no matter how small, too often.

Deprivation

I was gonna write something really funny but I'm tired.
You shall now be deprived of my funny.

I did a paper on deprivation model once. Paid well.

Mob Behaviour.

You know what I hate?
Loud fancy charity crap.
Its all over the place.
Charity mela, charity dance party, charity liquor, charity movie night, charity nude show.
An excuse for everyone to party like like theyre fighting a war.

So theres this Self-Righteous Princess of Pretentious Ville that I know. I think we all know one of those. You know the kind of person who just deserves to be in a better place and just knows better than everyone and knows everything thats wrong with the world and how everyone is not doing things right and has standards that just cannot be matched by anyone...especially a paki?
Yeeaaa....Ima punch her one of these days. But shes like a bit athletic so Im afraid she'll punch me back:\
I mean...even when shes having a normal conversation its like shes giving a presidential speech...and she never smiles...shes actually an IBA rejectee...if thats a real word. Must be hard for her to adjust in Bahria...but c'mon...get over it.
Itni annoying lagti haai....Id mimic her for you if I had a cam. I do it so well...makes them laugh every time ^.^
Also, I have a very...diverse sense of humor.
So back to the Princes...well...thats about it. Theres not much to her besides her smugness.
I guess thats all:\

Serious rant. Ignore.

Know how I always start things I have no intentions of finishing? And then suggest things I have no intentions of doing? And then lead people into believing silly things that I dont believe myself? Yeah I should probably stop doing that.
Anyway. I dont have anything funny or interesting to write so now is the time to stop reading.
Ive been in a weird state. Not myself. All nice and social.
I made FIVE friends last week. Good friends. I dint make that many friends in my whole life.
And there are at least 3 to 5 people attached to each one of these five friends.
So just imagine the number of times I have "hey" and "sup" on my way to the class.
Being social makes me sick.
But I dont have a choice cuz you need at least one friend in each course so you can ask for help or whatever or project shitty crap shit. Crappy shitty poopy de poo. Shitty crappy bloody shitty poop. Poop filled shitty crappy shit. Shitty de crappy de dung poo. Dung de poopy de pooy crap. Yeah thats whats going on in my head.
I hate this dissociative state more than depression.

On a brighter note, we're going to giddu poo (giddu bandar) on Saturday. That mental asylum in Hydrabad. I understand if you dont exactly see that as the brighter side. But I cant wait to go. I think it'll help me get over my pathetic self. Ive heard that the last they went..most of the students went mute for a week. Im sure they're exaggerating. But whatever. I might even stay back if I get too many sketching inspirations. I could use some right now. Oh Boo Hoo Uzma get a fucking life -.-

*Also, I found this piece of shit that I really like:

If the sun came out from behind me,
Would you look at my shadow or me?
If the person you saw was dressed in rags like me,
would you remember me?

If the colors of lie had faded
from your mortality like life for me,
would you rather die or become like me?

Now it is time for the sun to set like it has
for me,
would you stay here, here in this abandoned world of souls,
or leave like me?

Forced post - cuz Im afraid it'll fade away

I feel stupid putting up with all this.
I need to lash out on someone.
I dont have time to sketch it out.
Itne koi annoying loag haina.
And Im so much more annoying.
But its okay because Im easy to ignore since Im not loud or all over the place.
They're so happy.
Why is everyone in my university so happy?
What are they so happy about?
They're at Bahria not Harvard.
And yet there is at least ONE individual in almost all my classes that I am jealous of.
So theres this girl right...shes one of those people who think they're doing humanity a favor by existing. Anyway...shes annoying. Now now...its not just her smug walk. Thats not reason enough. We had our Management presentation bla bla bla and guess what she did? She took someone's thesis from the internet and just made her presentation on that...and here I was doing my own damn research making my own damn hypothesis coming with my own fucking solutions. But that was Okay. Until. One day. The marks were announced. I got 4.5 (out of 5) and Im like...yeah Bitch top that...and then suddenly she got 5.
Plagiarism bhi koi cheez hoti hai.
Yeah. So now I hate her.
Also there this other umm...not a bitch. Shes not even stupid. Just. Um. Damn I cant think of anything clever and insulting:\
Okay i'll write about her once I know what to call her.
Now I have to study for my exam tomorrow.
Stupid mids.
Stupid bio.
Stupid fancy ass terms in bio.

*Also, do notice my fb hotness.
**If you find it absurd, refrain from expressing yourself.